STP 108 | How to Transition from Therapist to Coach With Brenda Stewart
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Brenda Stewart: [00:00:00] I think some of the biggest challenges for me, and this might not be for everybody, but my own limiting beliefs and fears really came up of, Oh, I don't know. I didn't necessarily see myself as an entrepreneur in the first place, and I really learned as I went along. And then here I am going to start a second business.
Like who am I? Um, but I really had to lean into, Oh no, I can do this. It's a learned skill, and I'm doing it, right?
Before we dive into today's episode, I want to warmly invite you to a free learning event. I'm hosting with Joey Ragona. I. He is the founder of Strategic Business Coaching. He's a Clarity master and he's gonna teach us some skills on how to find and get an audience ready to buy. If you're a coach, a therapist, or just [00:01:00] somebody who's a mission-driven creator and you feel stuck or you're not sure who you, who you are talking to, Hey, this webinar is from you.
For you. It's not from you, it's for you. And it's happening March 24th at 1:00 PM Eastern, and you're gonna walk away with just some real clarity and a plan that you can use to connect and start conversations with the people who would love to buy something from you. So go to the show notes for this episode.
Joey's gonna give you some great ideas, so join that webinar.
I've learned so much from him. Uh, I just, I just want you to experience some of what I've had by listening to him and get some clarity on who your ideal customer is. [00:02:00] Hello and welcome to the scaling therapy practice. This is your host, James Marland. Today, I have a special guest, Brenda Stewart. Uh, she and I met at the wise practice summit two years ago, and I still follow her on social media and she is starting a coaching and consulting program.
James Marland: All while also being a therapist and a bunch of writing a book and all sorts of other things. I'm really pleased to have her on the show. I love her heart and her mission of helping people overcome the [00:03:00] things that they have gone through. So Brenda, welcome to the show.
Brenda Stewart: Thanks so much, James. I'm privileged to be here and I'm excited about this time. We get to talk.
James Marland: So you already have a career, right? You're a therapist. You probably went to school for eight plus years or so for that you've done all that work and you're starting to, you wanted to become, uh, you're, you're expanding to consulting and coaching. So walk me through a little bit of the process of your, your therapy and your therapy work, who you work with, and then the decision of taking the next step to become a coach and consultant.
Brenda Stewart: sure. So I am a licensed mental health counselor in Florida and a licensed professional counselor in South Carolina. And then I don't even know if I've told you this yet, James, but I'm a certified tribal healer
James Marland: Oh my word.
Brenda Stewart: medicine
James Marland: are.
Brenda Stewart: with the first nation medical board. So,
James Marland: really? Okay.
Brenda Stewart: I am. So that's a newer thing this past [00:04:00] year, but it's been wonderful so far.
So, um,
James Marland: You teach any college courses in your free time?
Brenda Stewart: Yeah, not yet, but it is on my list of things I want to do.
James Marland: I love it. I love it because teachers got to teach right like
Brenda Stewart: That's
James Marland: yeah So anyways, you you have all these things keep go keep keep telling us about yourself
Brenda Stewart: a private practice in And I specialize in working with women who have experienced trauma, a lot of complex trauma, or a single incident. I'm a certified EMDR therapist. And then also eating disorders. So a lot of times those two go hand in hand. So those are my areas of focus in my therapy practice.
James Marland: Yeah, those are uh heavy issues right like trauma and eating disorder. But it sounds like you found a niche there with with that. What attracted you to helping people with with those types of conditions?
Brenda Stewart: Honestly, it was my own personal story of recovery [00:05:00] and went through my own journey, my own battle of, uh, pretty severe eating disorder and had people walk alongside me and lead me to the path of, of recovery. And I just became passionate about, um, It's one thing to learn it from trainings or school or conferences, it's another to have lived experience of it, and to be able to hold that hope out for people. And so, I, you know, did a career change, went back to grad school when I was in a solid place myself. Became a therapist and that
James Marland: this is like a second, this is a second career already for you.
Brenda Stewart: I mean, yeah,
James Marland: Oh, that's awesome.
Brenda Stewart: that just means I'm that old James.
James Marland: I turned 50 last year. So I understand the old, so, uh, so you, You started a private practice in Florida. Um, and how long have you been [00:06:00] in practice?
Brenda Stewart: My own, I worked for other, another
James Marland: Okay.
Brenda Stewart: before, but my own practice has been four years.
James Marland: Okay. And as we were talking in the, the pre show, you, you started doing some, um, workshops and education for other people and that sort of awoke something inside you. Uh, can you talk about that and maybe some of the, the, the, Maybe some of the fears or struggles and then maybe when did, when did the light turn on for you that you wanted to start pursuing that?
Brenda Stewart: Yeah, so one thing you'll know about me is I'm an idea person. So I have to rein myself in a lot because I, I think on one test I scored in the 99th percentile for ideas and vision and all of these things. And so I can go from one to another and then have another vision and dream and get myself really into overwhelm real quick. so I had my private practice. I actually, Had started [00:07:00] a group practice, um, and had hired clinician was hiring some more had a admin that I had hired and had a turn of events. Um, I was diagnosed with a, an illness that required me to leave my office immediately because the office was toxic for me. And, um. In so doing, I had to scale back to solo practice and I had always had an interest in coaching, um, before I even became a therapist, my dad would always tell me you'd be a great life coach. You'd be a great, you know, coach for people. And so I was like, no, I'm a therapist. I'm going to be a therapist.
And that's what I'm called to do. And so it had always kind of been tossed around and it was in there, but I was focused on being a therapist. And then when I had to sort of do an about face and turn around, I re evaluated things. this is about a year and a half ago and started to really pray and lean into, okay, [00:08:00] what is this coaching and consulting?
And I found that I love being a therapist and I still will be a therapist, um, but I do work with pretty heavy cases and complex. And so. I needed some balance and, and really wanted, my heart is to make an impact and really mission minded and so with having to stay within the state lines as a therapist and the licensing requirements and laws and all of the things I wanted to be able to expand beyond that. And so I became passionate, I really went into. I like to have all my T's crossed and I's dotted. to a little bit of a perfectionistic degree. so I went through or I'm going through international coaching certification through ICF, um, to make sure I keep it separate and looked at, you know, the separate businesses and really, [00:09:00] to expand the impact in the offering of what I can when I can bring
James Marland: Can you explain that, that coaching program to me? I've think I've heard about it, but what is it and what, what attracted you?
Brenda Stewart: sure. Well, I'm the International Coaching Federation is a certification. They have an code of ethics, all of
James Marland: Okay.
Brenda Stewart: that can because coaching isn't necessarily have any standards or body governing bodies. Right? And so this. ICF offers certifications for coaches, and you go through training and have so many super so many hours of practice, things
James Marland: Okay. More supervision. That's the word I couldn't remember in the beginning. Supervision. Yeah.
Brenda Stewart: so I'm in 1 with, um, Dr. Liz Lasky, who actually it's for therapists who want to
James Marland: Okay. That's, that's kind of what I was wondering. Cause it's gotta be different for people who already have a license already.
Brenda Stewart: And it might not even be, [00:10:00] I mean, I know therapists who coach without the certification, um, and you know, that's probably fine too. I just want to make, I'm always wanting to make sure I'm doing everything, how it needs to be and keeping it separate and really understanding the nuances myself. So I
James Marland: Okay,
was there a tipping point when you're like, you know what? I am going to I'm going to make this decision to move forward for you. I think we talked a little bit about the, um, your cases are heavy. Like, the, the burnout is real. Uh, when I worked at the hospital, there were certain cases similar to what you're.
Yours are that they're like, they would only take so many of this type of case before they had to have a balance. And it sounds like you're trying to get a balance. of making an impact with what you want. But also the there are some cases that take more time, energy, mental energy, and their draining.
So was it the balance or was it something else that [00:11:00] you're you're looking for?
Brenda Stewart: think there's a couple of things. One is the balance. Two is, I feel like being in the therapy room utilizes, certain skill set that I have, and I'll continue to lead it lean into, but I felt like there was a part of me that wasn't accessing as much of that. I also feel like I'm created to be and have the, the skills and the gifting to be able to do.
And I wanted to lean into that more. And part of that is teaching. And, you know, I would love to go back and get my PhD, but it's expensive. And so, um, that's not really in the cards right now, maybe in the future. And so I thought, what can I do that involves bringing some teaching, some training, some things like that to people?
And so having the coaching and consulting, I'm able to go in, provide workshops, do trainings for staff. I've done some for the Legal Aid Society, for some [00:12:00] nonprofits on, you know, the prevention and recovery of compassion fatigue. then With the diagnosis that I have in my history of recovery from an eating disorder, I started doing research and study on the correlation between those two, and really found that there's a high correlation.
And so doing consulting and training for professionals treating trauma and eating disorders on how to screen their clients, how to identify the signs, things like that. So it was Partly my own story, partly leaning into more of who I am. And then, um, I ran a trauma intensive through my therapy practice a year, a little over a year and a half ago.
And it was of my most favorite things I've ever done. I love doing program development and the intensive work, bringing in the creativity and the interactive stuff. And so I thought, well, what's the way I can do this? and [00:13:00] go to different locations or, know, have my end goal dream, but I'm not there yet. And so I can do that if I do more of a coaching and a different population, um, and more of a retreat set. So it was wanting to lean into more, wanting to increase the and have more balance.
James Marland: Yeah, because there's it sounds like there was some creative side, teaching side that wasn't being nourished, though you have the Desire to help in that way. And then also there, there's a limit like there's a, there's a hard cap for time for sure. But then there's a hard cap. ish for for how many people you can have that have a certain diagnosis or certain need their needs are just greater.
Brenda Stewart: Yeah. And sometimes, you know, I was finding I'm seeing clients coming in who they don't fit a diagnosis.
James Marland: Mm
Brenda Stewart: they don't have a [00:14:00] diagnosable disorder for the DSM
James Marland: hmm.
Brenda Stewart: I found what I was doing with them was a lot more coaching. so I thought, if I'm doing this, and these are some clients who are energizing me, then how can I expand this and not have to be within the confines of state lines?
James Marland: Yeah. And, and the, uh, that retreat you did, uh, the intensive, um, that's, that there's a, uh, Jim call Jim Collins. From, uh, great by choice calls it fire bullets than cannonballs where you fire a short term expenditure of resources. See if it works, make adjustments fire again. And then when you're ready to invest heavily, you're already kind of like keyed in to the process that you've done.
So it sounds like that little first. That first, uh, retreat or intensive was a, like a test, a test shot to see if it [00:15:00] worked. And guess what? It, it, it, it did. It energized you.
Brenda Stewart: Absolutely.
James Marland: So where, where, what's the next steps for you? Um, Well, what were some of the challenges you had to overcome to even get this far?
What were some of the questions or things that, you know, if somebody's going to follow in your footsteps or their thing, you know, they're, they're, they're really connecting with you. Like, Oh yeah, I want to be creative. I don't want to burn out. I want to help more people. I want to make an impact, but I'm not sure what to do.
What, what were some of those challenges you had to overcome? To, um, get this far right now.
Brenda Stewart: I think some of the biggest challenges for me, and this might not be for everybody, but my own limiting beliefs and fears really came up of, Oh, I don't know. I didn't necessarily see myself as an entrepreneur in the first place, and I really learned as I went along. And then here I am going to start a second business.
Like who am I? [00:16:00] Um, but I really had to lean into, Oh no, I can do this. It's a learned skill, and I'm doing it, right? Um, and then the fears of, oh, what if it doesn't take off, and I'm investing all of this, maybe I'm spreading myself too thin. You know, all of the doubts, the fears, the questions. Um, and really found that my own limiting beliefs were wrong. You know, the fear of failure, the fear of not being enough or whatever that might be, we're under that. So it's an invitation to really do another level layer of growth Um, that also impacts professionally
James Marland: I mean, I'm right there with you. Uh, you know, three years ago, as I was thinking about starting the course creation business, like, who's going to listen to me? I don't have a big audience. I don't have any resources. Um, no marketing, no social media presence, all the no's, you know, comparing yourself to other people.[00:17:00]
I'll tell you something that helped me, but what, how, that's a big cliff, you know, what you're talking about is like, that's, that's really tough to overcome. Um, what made you take that first step? Like, was, was there a, was it talking to somebody? Was it a therapeutic? Trick? Like, did you read a book? Like what, what happened?
Brenda Stewart: You just swallow a pill and it's all better? No. Um, I did. I read a book, um, on therapists becoming coaches.
James Marland: What, what is that book? I'm, I want to put it in the notes.
Brenda Stewart: Um, that's a
James Marland: it?
Brenda Stewart: question. I think it's Therapreneur.
James Marland: Therapenur. Okay.
Brenda Stewart: by Carly Hill.
James Marland: Okay.
Brenda Stewart: can't I don't know if that's the exact name. I'll have to get it to you.
James Marland: We'll find it. It'll be in the show notes. I think that'll be a great resource for people. There's many people in the same situation. Okay. So you read a book.
Brenda Stewart: and that was really, I got really excited and felt, [00:18:00] okay, this is something I want to go down. And then through, I did a kind of business mastery six week course that started to help me identify the focus that I wanted to have in the business and ideal clients and all of that. And then I joined a Jane Carter's business mastermind and that's been so helpful because it's so action based.
I can. Have the idea and put in the plan and write the course and do all of the things. But then it's like, uh, fear stops me from implementing it. So that's been really helpful. Just having the accountability and having, uh, someone who's walked the road ahead, like a mentor saying, or a coach myself saying, all right, here's the steps, here's, you know, what you need to consider, here's how to do these things.
James Marland: Yeah, that's, that's a great point. Um, often people don't want to put any money into coaching until they're starting to make money. If you're, [00:19:00] if you're running into a problem, how are you going to solve it? Like if you built a restaurant or opened a restaurant and you're like, well, I'm not going to buy any food until the people come in.
No, I'm not going to, I'm not going to do any advertising for my, my business until I'm actually making money. You're not that, that, that doesn't work for other businesses. Why would it work for a coaching or consulting business?
Brenda Stewart: hmm. Mm hmm.
James Marland: I think coaching is important. I think one of the things that helped me a lot, and, and I'll have to dig it out, I have a handout on it.
Uh, it's, I'm sure it's in the blog somewhere. It's just a, it was an exercise of like writing down all your fears, and then on the left side, and then writing down on the right side, what's a more realistic reframe.
Brenda Stewart: Yes, that's great.
James Marland: It was, it was, uh, it was from a Mike McCollough, it's book. I can't remember which one, one of his business books he's he does business books.
Did you know that
Brenda Stewart: Yes.
James Marland: he's a, he's a great resource and, uh, and it, and it, all the things on the [00:20:00] left hand side, like. I don't have an audience, but the reframe is nobody has an audience when they start. Like, I, I don't have any students. Well, nobody has any students when they start. Um, I'm not as big as whatever, you know, pick, pick a consultant.
And it's like, well, they're 20 years in, of course, you're not as big as they are. Like,
Brenda Stewart: starts
James Marland: yeah, everybody starts somewhere. And, uh, yeah. So I love that reframe. It didn't take away all the fears, but it also just made them more realistic. It wasn't like pie in the sky, rosy glasses, like everything will be great.
You just make it and they'll come. But it did help with, you know, you some of your fear there. Your fears are a little bit overblown, but you are. You're, you're, you're making them, you're, you're, you're making some assumptions that are not true. And so some, every once in a while, I do still think about those, that, that process or when I [00:21:00] have the imposter syndrome and, uh, yeah, I did, I did start getting, I did start investing coaching just like you did, like I started putting money into a couple of classes here and then a coach here.
And then, uh, I'm in a year long program now just to improve my skills. So.
Brenda Stewart: I think it's so helpful and a good, good investment and appropriate, you know, when appropriate and investment that is. That's going to be so beneficial. I found it beneficial. And yeah, those reframes are, are critical, right? Because our fears in our head can just get so huge and then we stay alone in them. But if we put it on paper or we can talk it out with somebody and engage in those reframes, it's like, oh, okay, I can do this next step. Right. And we don't need to look a year down the road necessarily. It's like, what's the. Yes, for planning purposes, but with one step I can take today.
James Marland: Yeah, absolutely. In fact, I'm [00:22:00] reading, um, business by the book right now, Donald Miller. And he talks about having two, two to do lists. One is the, all the stuff that you got to get done. And the other list is the top three things that you must get done today. That move you towards your goal. Your brain can't tell the difference between the two lists, the important stuff, you know, the busy work or the important stuff.
So if you have that, those things written down, you have. Action, not just motion. I really like that. You know, doing the important things and having the list. I'm going to have to, I'm going to have to listen to that book multiple like it is like, it's like a business course in a book. So anyway, so, uh, in the last little bit here, can you tell us like.
What what's next for you with your with your consulting and coaching practice or business? And who who would be an ideal client for you?
Brenda Stewart: Absolutely. So my [00:23:00] coaching business, it is a separate LLC, separate websites, separate bank accounts, all the things to keep it legit. Um, but it's balanced life strategies and. Kind of a play off my initials, BLS, so BLS Coaching and Consulting as well. And I'm going to be having three areas of focus. My ideal client for coaching would be the high functioning, high achieving, person who also has a sensitive nervous system wiring and Feels like no matter how much they do.
There's they're just not quite enough um and really coaching through that through different coaching packages and Opportunities and then i'll be creating some online courses Which i'm super excited about that will be for people to be able to get and do at their own time. Um As they can and are able to, and then the consulting and training is more for nonprofits, veterinary medicine professionals, uh, very various [00:24:00] Christian ministries on the prevention and burnout of compassion fatigue. And so those are the kind of 3 arms that I'm doing right now and retreat will be held for each of those. Areas of focus, um, for those populations, and eventually I would love to have my own retreat center where I could host, you know, whether it's therapy intensives or retreats, um, 3 to 5 day intensives or retreats for people and just have it really a place of soul care. I think so many times people in the helping profession are pouring out and it's emotionally, mentally exhausting and if they are not poured into. or caring well for their soul, then it's going to be a recipe for disaster, really. And so I'm passionate about helping the helper or the high functioning person who is doing all of the things, wearing all the hats and tending to their soul, letting [00:25:00] them know they're seen and understood and that they're enough.
James Marland: That's, that's great. I think we really connect on the mission aspect of our of our Businesses like helping people live their best lives and be the most that they can be by helping them live out their mission by helping them not burn out by helping them put, put the things in place that they need to or take things out, especially the, uh, the people who are, you know, Who are doing the heavy lifting in the social services, you know, uh, the, the coaches, the consultants, the ministers, the social workers, um, the volunteers, uh, all those people who are giving and giving, but who, who builds into them, where can they get help and support?
That's, that's really neat. Uh, do you want me to mention the, uh, the book or should I not mention the book?
Brenda Stewart: Absolutely. He's a little [00:26:00] on my logo and all the things.
James Marland: Oh, okay. So, so, uh, one of the, one of the things that excited me, um, when we started talking in the pre show is you were, you're making, um, you're getting ready to write a book or you are writing a book. What can you tell me? Just give us a taste of what that is.
Brenda Stewart: sure. I'm actually just about in the editing stage. So it is in process. Um, it's going to be a book on overcoming and specifically lessons learned from a blind dog. So if you go to my website, the balanced life strategies or. See pictures on there. You'll see my Boston Terrier, Samson, and he, a couple of years ago, had to have both eyes removed suddenly, and I watched him going from, go from jumping after frisbees one day to the next morning being completely blind, and then the course of a couple months, having to have his eyes removed, and I was taking him for a walk one day, just looking how far, looking at how far he had come in a short amount of time, and I was like, wow, you're such an overcomer, [00:27:00] then immediately it was like, are lessons that I've, we can learn from his journey of overcoming.
And so as I'm passionate about helping people overcome whatever it is in their life, the limiting beliefs, the situations, the career struggles, stressors, um, the, yeah, I figured let's, let's do the book. So writing the book and incorporating some therapeutic, therapeutic principles, coaching things, um, and lessons from my blind dog.
James Marland: that's great. Well, we'll keep us updated with that. Uh, when you, when you release it, we'll definitely put a little note in the email and the webpage about that. That's, uh, it's really neat and really inspiring, um, overcomers. All right. So one last thing, where can people find you on the internet? Is there, um, a place where they should go to find out more about you and your services?
Brenda Stewart: Sure. Absolutely. My coaching website [00:28:00] is balanced life strategies.com. I'm also on Instagram, LinkedIn, Facebook at Balanced Life Strategies, and then we'll be up and coming a YouTube channel. So tuned,
James Marland: Okay. Well, Brenda, it's been wonderful to have you at the show. Thank you so much for sharing with us and their guests and just being an inspiring, uh, inspiration to, to us.
Brenda Stewart: Absolutely. Thanks so much, James.
James Marland: This is James for Course Creation Studio and the Scaling Therapy Practice. You can be an overcomer. It's now time to put your mission in motion.
